18 November 2006

hot and bothered in Hell's Kitchen

i'm staying in a studio apartment (modern day tenement housing) in Hell's Kitchen (near Times Square), and it's damn damn hot in it. generally i find they heat the buildings too hot for me in North America, but this is the most ridiculously hot i've ever been in 26 years of experiencing different temperatures.

every time i enter the building i break out into a sweat, and by the time i've come up the stairs and entered the apartment i feel like i'm going to faint. so it's then this mad rush to strip down to my underwear and go stand by the OPEN window (i have to leave it open all the time). and sometimes i have a cold shower. and sometimes i've even resorted to turning the air-conditioning on.

anyway! so i was all hot and bothered tonight and it got to the point where i had trouble breathing. so i decided to take a walk.

about 15 minutes later i was starting to feel better when i noticed shop selling 'Soy Bundts!' having no idea what this was i wandering in for a peek and discovered a bundt is a little cake that looks like it's been cooked in a jelly dish.

i decided a bundt was not for me, and turned to leave the shop... at this point i noticed the one other customer in the shop looked very familiar. so very obviously i turned around to study the bundts some more... while slyly glancing at the man standing next to me.

the customer got his bundt and left.
the girl behind the counter asked me if i wanted anything.
'did that guy look familiar to you?' i asked
'yeah... he's in the Wedding Singer' she replied.
'oh my gawd! it's Constantine!' i blurted.

that's right, Constantine, the 'New York rocker' with smoldering glances from American Idol Fame, now staring in the Broadway musical The Wedding Singer as 'best man'... was buying a bundt!

i wish i had of said something to him. i knew he was in The Wedding Singer. that's it, if i see him again, he's mine.

anyway, so I brought a ‘pumpkin soy bundt’ and returned home from my walk more hot and bothered than ever.

done by Dot


Mars said...

his name's Constantine... he was in american idol... fucking veto.

Enny said...

Was it yummy?

Dot said...

my first celebrity sighting and my first bundt. both were pretty good but, yes, probably room for improvement.

Dave Mack said...

its the same in Paris in the winter time. Those fucking department stores jesus!

kiki said...

and london dave

and tokyo

because it is generally colder than here, they are always dreaming of here and other 'paradise' type places. because their winters are so bad, they make everything so warm. the subway / underground / tube / metro is the same too. wherever you go

Jessie said...

As much as you find North American buildings cold, I find Australian (...well, Melbourne's anyway) SERIOUSLY freezing.

I think it all goes back to your childhood. With those little uniforms? How the crap do those keep you from getting hypothermia in a Melb winter!? Shocking really.